148.

there are a lot of things that i have done that i am ashamed and embarrassed about. but they have made me the person i am today. this came up a lot today. i'm glad we talked and i'm glad you understand. i know you might not think i will come to you in the future, but i really will. it was scary, the past few weeks. i didn't have you and that was truly the worst part of it all. i'm glad i made that decision and i'm glad you're such an accepting and forgiving person. i'm glad you can make me laugh even when we discuss serious things. you told me what everyone else told me. but i'm sure i'll prove all of you wrong. i'm stronger than you think. i know you care a lot about me and i don't want you worrying. that's why i'm telling you now that i'm fine, and i always will be as far as this goes. i can't thank you enough for being such a great person. i love you, mike. anyway. today was okay. didn't have to act out plays in creative writing, no essay in english, and i actually got a 100 on that bio quiz. so whaaatev. i did all my homework so i feel pretty good. shower soon. oh, almost forgot. it was really good to see that things are still pretty normal for us. or at least better. granted, they aren't how they used to be, but i'm thankful for this. i just don't see why they changed so fast. we got so close so fast and all of a sudden, what? i don't know. i really don't. i think we both know at least some of the reason, though. probably the entire reason. i just don't want to be the one to say it. i hope things get normal again. but the way this is going, they won't. idk. but in other news. i have a good feeling about you and me. it might have taken 2 years but i'm glad we started talking again. you give me a really good feeling. i'm excited to see where this goes. overall, there's a lot of bullshit in my life currently, but i'm finding the reasons to pull through. xo.