53.

so, doodling is pm my favorite. i love writing out lyrics or quotes or whatever is in my head. i feel like i'm good at it. this part says "it's only after you've lost everything that you're free to do anything." it's one of my favorite quotes from the movie fight club (bradpitt bradpitt bradpitt bradpitt). no but really, even besides him, it's one of my favorite movies ever. this page also says: "think of me what you will, but before you do, don't" -alex gaskarth. "take my hand and we will run away" -the cab. "and god must be a pretty big fan of today, because you keep waking up to it" -jamie tworkowski. and "our lives are defined by oppurtunities, even the ones we miss" -benjamin button. it's pretty cute. so, i'm not really doing anything today. idk. i barely had any homework this vacation, which is something very new to me. i only had to read a chapter in a book and answer 5 questions about it, which i did yesterday. wooooooohoo. also, i don't know why but i feel like i need you again. it's weird to think about you in good ways like i used to and i don't want to get in over my head again. i'm scared. i just want you to be here. i want to talk to you. i want things to be easy. i want you to be better and to never have to struggle like this again. i want all the best for you, despite what i've said in the past. i would never wish you harm. keep that in mind. i'm not a little girl anymore. i will depend on you just has much as you depend on me. and i don't know where i'm going with this, because you'll never read it. but oh well. yeah, idek. i hate sundays, especially rainy ones. but i guess i'll make the best of this one. i might be back to write more later. peace. ps. i miss you.