320.

ohhhhello, i'm in spanish, fun. today was okay. wore a shirt for the first time and i really like it. not like anyone cares. so i read through a lot of my old blogs today. it seriously fucking makes me think. and i'm such an analytical person. sometimes too much. but whatever. i am how i am and i can't change that. idk. i guess i can just say that sometimes, i miss how things were. no matter what. i may laugh at that now, but i know that at some point, those people and things were what made me happy. and regardless of the present, i miss that. idk, am i making sense? i think this is one of the main reasons i made a 365 blog. i read day 1. and i wrote this, "yep, three hundred and sixty five pictures. i hope they will depict my life and gave me many memories to look back on eventually." and they definitely fucking have. this blog has become a huge part of my life. it's so important to me to be able to look back on days i loved and never want to forget. even those shitty days and weeks where all i wanted to do was kill everyone... at least i got my feelings out, somewhere. reading about all that makes me remember exactly how i felt. and even if it was a bad feeling, i still like knowing that i can remember it. idk. especially since i'm big on remembering dates. this was an awesome idea. i can't believe we're halfway through november already. and then it's december. i'm seriously debating another 365 for 2010. i mean, yeah i love it. but it was also... idk. kind of annoying sometimes. i'm definitely moving to tumblr on january 1st, but should i do another 365? if i don't, i know i'll definitely miss it, a lot. and there will be times where i regret it. i need opinions. i know it's really good for me to get all my feelings out, so maybe i should? idk. brings me to another point. no one ever comments this anymore, lawls. idunno. people used to! also something i noticed when i was reading old stuff. anyway. blasting john mayer right now. i took a walk earlier. not stoked that it's getting really cold, almost too cold for my walks. well. on another note, i don't know why you're so nervous. i've told you so many times not to care what people think. just listen to me, for once jerk! (: but really, i love how close we are. i really do. it's better than anything else i've had. i think you're worth everything. i feel really lame when i tell anyone how i actually feel. yeah, even you. but i do anyway. you really are a great kid, trust me. and i hate when you're negative, you know that. don't think about possibilities in the future, because that's not where you're living. you're here, in the present, right now. and if you're happy, and i'm happy, that's all that matters. love. xo.

edit. if you're going to criticize me, learn to spell ;D